Keeping A Beautiful Woman Attracted

***DATING QUESTION FROM READER***

Hello, David!

I want to start by thanking you for your work.
Once in a great while, someone comes along that
truly wants to help others succeed, and puts in
the effort to the research and testing, and makes
something great for others. You are one of those
people, and I'm glad to see you succeed by helping
so many others do the same.

I was reaching to find answers, like a lot of us
were, and found your material. It has been
awesome. In the last week, I saw the most
attractive woman I perhaps ever have. She was a
9.5 on my scale, which is truly rare to find for
me. Not just in looks, but a great personality.
Instead of giving in to my normal habits, I
applied the methods you taught. We went out to a
club, and had a great time. I had another friend
of mine there, and I used him as a means to
partially ignore her at times, constantly making
jokes that were just too quiet for her to hear,
and looking at her and smiling when doing it. She
constantly wanted to know what was funny, yet she
wasn't mad, just shyly curious. I was aloof, yet
not terribly too distant from her. I would wander
off by myself, knowing she was with my friend, and
leave them hanging alone for a little while now
and then. (I knew my friend wasn't going to hit on
her). I would go up to other girls and whisper
something in their ear right in front of her, to
give her the idea that I was completely
comfortable in my own skin with women. Once, on my
way back from the dance floor, I found her with
some other guy. I flashed a sly little smile, but
kept on walking right by, as if to imply "You have
a good time there. I could care less. As a matter
of fact, you look a tad pathetic coming on to
him." She soon returned and said that I had been
gone too long, and some guy had "dragged her away
from me". That night, I had resisted the urge to
act like anything but the kind of man you would
teach someone to be. All urges at wussness were
disregarded, and I played the part to a tee. Even
though it didn't entirely feel normal or
comfortable at first, I could see that it was
definitely working, so I kept it up. I would
occasionally catch her staring at me from the
corner of my eye, sometimes for 2 or 3 seconds. I
didn't react, but just kept saying to myself
"Damn. David has been right the whole time".

I woke up the next morning with a weird feeling...
this was something I had never achieved before. I
don't mean sex with a woman soon after I met her,
but the fact that she was so damn gorgeous. At
the risk of sounding a little chauvinistic, she
was the best girl I have ever had. Well, over the
next two weeks or so, I kept coming over and doing
things during the days with her and staying at
night. This is when things began to change.

You had a timeless question from a guy once who
said something like "After I sleep with a woman
why do I feel like hating her?" Well, I normally
feel the same. But with this girl, it was
different. I wanted to keep her. But, the more
time we spent together, the more we started to
both feel like whatever I sparked was fading
quick. I could see the thrill of our initial
meeting was dying, and I wanted to add to my image
in her mind the idea that I could be a part of her
daily life too, not just the nighttime party one.

I felt like I had to show her something that
proved I didn't just want her for sex. I knew I
couldn't let her interpret it as me buying her
attention or body, although I'm afraid that may
have been exactly what I did. I ended up
purchasing her and her roommate a full stock of
groceries, which they definitely needed. It gave
me some kind of a sense that I had shown that I
was more than just a sex buddy, which really felt
good to me. However, lately she has pulled away.
We will still go out and have a good time, but
more like friends, with only a little flirting.
She now refuses sex, saying "it would complicate
things." By the way, although she has been in
long-term relationships since she was 16, she
currently isn't, and seems to be enjoying the
party life a lot. She is 22 now. I know you said
in your audio series that it is a mistake to try
to tie down a party girl, but she told me of her
long-term history with guys, and that's why I
tried. Did I screw up by getting too close too
fast? Was it unrealistic for me to show that kind
of attention to her needs that quick or at all?
How many times should a guy see a girl each week
if he wants to keep up the attraction and have a
great time, but not become too familiar to her?

Thanks man.

Confused, -J

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Oh, I feel your pain.

I'm sure that just about every man alive can
identify with this story in one way or another...
even if it doesn't involve a woman that you'd
describe as a "9.5".

So, let's talk about the situation you're in,
what happened at first, and what to do now...

First of all, congratulations on the fact that
you were able to make this kind of success happen
in the first place!

You're doing great, and I know how good it
feels to have this kind of success with a really
attractive woman.

It sounds like you're really starting to "get
it" at a deep level. The more you continue to
study the materials you have (especially the CD
Series) the more you'll understand how to attract
these UNUSUALLY attractive women... and more
importantly, KEEP THEM ATTRACTED.

Let's review a few of my main concepts, and how
they apply to this situation...

ATTRACTION ISN'T A CHOICE

Explained differently, a woman doesn't
CONSCIOUSLY CHOOSE to feel attracted to a man.

A woman also doesn't consciously choose to STOP
her attraction for a man.

It happens for reasons that seem very illogical
to most men.

The things you were doing when you first met
this girl were EXACTLY the right things for
creating this wonderful feeling of ATTRACTION
inside of her.

And she obviously enjoyed it tremendously.

You mentioned that you didn't feel totally
comfortable at first, but since it was obvious
that she was becoming more and more interested in
you, you kept going... which led to you getting
together with her.

But, remember the flip side: If you start doing
the WRONG things, the woman will LOSE her
ATTRACTION for you as well. And it will happen ALL
BY ITSELF. The worst part is that you can't
logically convince her to keep feeling attracted
to you. If you screw it up, you're probably going
to screw it up to a point that is almost
impossible to fix.

More of the "psychology" of creating and
amplifying attraction is here:

http://www.datingtechniques.com/AttractionBook


GIVE HER THE GIFT OF MISSING YOU

What do most guys do as soon as they meet a
REALLY HOT, ultra-attractive woman?

Of course! They call three times a day, and
want to see her all the time.

Attractive women know better than to do this.

When an attractive woman meets a man she likes,
she usually PLAYS HARD TO GET. Instead of calling,
she acts like she's BUSY.

This makes the man try even harder, and pursue
her even more...

It sounds like you did exactly the opposite.

In your email here you say:

"Well, over the next two weeks or so, I kept
coming over and doing things during the days with
her and staying at night. This is when things
began to change..."

No no no!

Over the next two weeks you should have called
her every few days, and seen her maybe three times
for a few hours each.

No "doing things during the days with her and
staying at night"!

You really need to remember to GIVE HER THE
GIFT OF MISSING YOU!

If you're around all the time, you become
predictable, expected, and uninteresting.

On the other hand, if you're mysterious,
challenging, and hard to pin down, she will think
about you and miss the times she's had with you.

DON'T TURN INTO A WUSS

This is one of the biggest mistakes that men
make when they meet a woman that they REALLY like.

I get a lot of emails from guys saying "I met
this girl, and I used everything I've learned from
Double Your Dating to get her... but now that
we've been seeing each other for awhile things are
changing, and I'm starting to lose control of how
I act... and I'm turning into my old Wussy
self..."

As I'm sure you can guess, this is bad bad bad
for attraction.

When you start out by doing things that are
attractive to her, then gradually turn into a WUSS
BAG, you go from her wildest dream to her worst
nightmare right in front of her eyes.

If you figure out how to make a woman feel
ATTRACTION for you, then KEEP DOING WHAT YOU'RE
DOING!

Don't start being a clingy Wuss. Translation:
Don't spend every day and night with her, don't
buy her groceries, and don't try to get her into a
relationship fifteen minutes after you meet her.

You also mentioned a few little words that
stood out for me: "I kept coming over...".

YOU kept coming over. When you're the one
coming to her, then she's the one in control.
Think about it. This is a small point, and it
isn't always the case, but in this situation it
makes a difference.

So, what should you do now?

You should give her some space. Don't call her
more than once or twice a week, and don't see her
more than once or twice a week for awhile. Don't
pressure her physically, and don't try to push for
a relationship.

DATE OTHER WOMEN! Get out there and go out with
some other women... and when you talk to her don't
hide the fact that you're doing it. Be casual
about it, but feel free to mention it in
conversation once or twice.

GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE

Don't get hung up, don't obsess about her, and
don't make it important to "win her back". Just
move on.

This combination will give you the greatest
chance of winning her back...

And the next time you meet a beautiful woman
that has an interesting personality, DON'T TURN
INTO A PREDICTABLE, BORING, CLINGY, WUSSY!

You've done a great job getting this far. Now
get back in there and take this to the next level!

And if you're reading this right now and
thinking to yourself "I need to learn this stuff
so I can meet beautiful women like this guy...",
then we have to talk.

One of the most important insights I've gotten
from learning the secrets of how to attract women
is very interesting...

I've realized that if a man doesn't know how to
attract women, it spills over into all other areas
of his life. It's a very special kind of
insecurity that causes a lot of problems in other
areas as well.

Let's face it.

Just about everything that men do to achieve
material success in life is somehow connected to
ATTRACTING WOMEN.

But guess what?

Material success won't make the INSECURITY and
the FEAR go away!

The only thing that WILL make it go away is
actually LEARNING how to attract women.

I know, because I've been there. I can CLEARLY
remember how different I felt inside when I had no
idea how to meet women... and I know how different
it feels now that I do.

My relationships work better, because I'm not
acting AFRAID... afraid that she's going to leave,
afraid I won't be able to find someone else...
etc.

And when I'm single, I'm happy. I don't
constantly worry anymore, not knowing if I'll ever
meet another woman.

I personally think that taking the time to
learn how to make women feel ATTRACTION is one of
the best investments you will ever make in
yourself and your life, period.

It might be THE best investment.

If you'd like to get the best training
available in the WORLD, then you need to get
yourself a copy of my Advanced Dating Techniques
CD/DVD Program.

It's a complete education, from the psychology
of how to overcome fear and improve your self
image, all the way to specific techniques for
approaching, meeting, and dating women... and even
how to take things to a "physical level" without
rejection.

I absolutely guarantee that this program will
change your success with women.

All the details, plus some great free audio and
video samples are here:

http://www.datingtechniques.com/AdvancedSeries

If you've gone through my Advanced Dating
Techniques program, and you enjoyed the INNER GAME
aspects of attracting women... and you've realized
that REALLY attractive women are more attracted to
INNER qualities than "techniques"... AND you want
to learn how to become the kind of man that women
are NATURALLY attracted to... and that they STAY
attracted to...

...then you REALLY need to check out my
program: "On Being A Man... Who Naturally Attracts
Women".

Inside this program you'll learn how to develop
the QUALITIES inside YOURSELF that women are
"naturally" attracted to.

This program will teach you how to leave your
"Inner Wuss" behind, and how to cultivate a
natural masculine power that women find literally
IRRESISTIBLE.

All the details are here:

http://www.datingtechniques.com/OnBeingAMan

And if you haven't taken the time to download
my online eBook "Double Your Dating", then you
need to go and do that RIGHT NOW. You can download
it right now and be reading it within a few
minutes. Go and get it here:

http://www.datingtechniques.com/eBook

I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David D.

10 Essential Flirting Moves You Must Know

There are 10 essential flirting moves that you must know. These are critical if you are to get out of the "Friend" zone and into the "Potential Lover" category with any woman:

1. Smiling. You must smile. You probably think you smile now, but you don't, really. You should practice your smile in the mirror--to be big enough to be noticed, your smile will probably have to be bigger than you are used to.

2. Getting caught looking. Most people look away when the object of their desire looks at them. If you want to let that person know you are interested, when she catches you looking, smile, hold eye contact a moment longer, then look away.

3. Waving. A little wave to someone who caught you looking, along with a smile, is a non-intrusive, very flirty way to say "hello."

4. Winking. You can wink at someone from across the room, or wink at someone during a conversation. If she says something funny, or someone else does something silly, you can give a wink as a way of sharing a little moment for just the two of you, as if the two of you are in on some private joke no one else is aware of.

5. Asking "what's the story behind that?" You can ask "what's the story behind that?" about any special or unusual thing your quarry is wearing or carrying. Examples: "that's really neat bracelet you are wearing. What's the story behind that?" or "That's a really great briefcase. What's the story behind that?" Even if there isn't much of one, it's given you some conversation.

6. Holding eye contact. While you are conversing with her, you want to be sure to have eye contact at least some of the time. At least once it's a good idea to hold the eye contact a little "too long," just a fraction too long, so there's a brief, more intimate moment between you.

7. Non-intrusive touching. This can be as simple as placing your hand lightly on her hand for a moment, or touching her back for a moment as you walk to a table to sit down. Just do this a couple of times on the first flirting interaction--if she pulls away, don't do it again.

8. Checking her out. Checking out her body must be done properly. The goal is for your new friend to feel complimented that you noticed her body, not objectified like some piece of meat. You do this by making eye contact, then quickly, in less than a second, passing your eyes down and then up over her body, then back to looking in the eyes. It should happen quickly, and you should be unashamed of taking a glance. Just don't do it too often.

9. Using the "Good-bye compliment." If you are shy, flirting with the "good-bye compliment" may be just the thing you need. On your way out, you simply go up to the woman you want to flirt with, and say something like, "Hi, I have to go now, but before I did, I really wanted to let you know that you have a really great sense of style, and that I noticed it. I wish I had more time to spend with you, but I have to go." Then leave. This allows you to build your confidence in approaching women, without having to take the risk of rejection--after all, you have to leave, you couldn't stay even if they wanted you to! (Some men also ask for phone numbers at this point.)

10. Stopping while it's still fun. Remember, flirting should be fun, and you should leave the flirting interaction feeling victorious. Most men leave their flirting interactions feeling like failures because they don't stop until it stops being fun. If you stop flirting on a high point, while it's still fun, your new friend will feel good when thinking of you, and want to see you again.

Giving Compliments... Should You or Shouldn't You?

Let's clear up the confusion surrounding compliments.

A lot of guys think that the way into a girl's pants is to suck up to her and kiss her ass through excessive compliments and gift-buying.

Of course, giving too many compliments to a woman, especially about her looks, only makes you look NEEDY and desperate. At best she'll think "Oh another desperate guy," and at worst it gives her the green light to walk all over you.

On the other hand, some guys have the philosophy that you should NEVER compliment a girl to avoid looking needy. But this isn't right either.

Giving a compliment can be VERY powerful with a woman when you say it directly, smoothly, and with no apologies. The key difference is this - if you give her a compliment from a position of power then she will see you as a powerful person who and she will continue to work for your approval. On the other hand, if you give her a compliment out of sexual neediness then she will see you as a weak beggar.

Make Compliments Work For You

Compliments are useful in that they can put her in a good frame of mind about you. A compliment can work for you by noticing something she put a lot of effort into, something that most guys don't take the time to notice - therefore setting yourself apart from the pack.

For instance, if she's wearing something unusual, compliment on that. Or is she has put highlights in hair, mention that. If she's gone out of her way to stick out her breasts, you can even compliment her on that. If you can't think of anything, tell her how she has such a nice energy. In ALL cases it's important that your attitude is calm and playful - NOT needy and desperate.

And whatever you say, say it like that you mean it. If your voice isn't congruent with the power of your compliment, it will ring false.

Now, should you compliment a woman on her looks? For especially beautiful women in particular, avoid complimenting their beauty. They may well appreciate it, but that's what EVERY guy tells them, and they probably have the compliment associated with a lot of losers. So you're not setting yourself apart from the losers and you risk getting associated with a bunch of needy desperate guys.

Give It, Then Fractionate Away

Compliments are made more powerful by using them SPARINGLY and FRACTIONATING.

For example, you may give her a compliment ONCE on her great smile, and then start being more cocky and funny, or simply change the direction of the conversation away from her. Don't continue to dwell on her great smile.

Or, compliment and then instantly do a "take back" which can be even more powerful. For example, say to her, "You know, it looks like you put a lot of time into your hair... I mean it's really beautiful... but... I just noticed... that... you have some hair that's out of place and is going a little crazy right here." In this example, you give the compliment about her hair, and then you "take back" when you tell her it's out of place. Just make sure the "take back" is something comparatively minor to the compliment and can be corrected, otherwise it comes off as an insult. For example, if you said, "Your hair is beautiful, but that style went out in the 60's," she'd probably take that as an insult.

If anything, just keep in the mind the fundamental rules; give compliments sparingly, if at all. And if you feel you're about to give one out of neediness or for lack of anything else better to say, keep it to yourself.

Regards,

Derek Vitalio

Learn the Science of Seduction
http://www.seductionscience.com/

Testing her Readiness for the First Kiss

The secret of getting the first kiss is so simple that that, once you understand it, getting it will be a trivial risk rather than a huge event. The secret is the pre-work. By the time you go for that kiss you must have her so ready, so prepared, and so desiring, that kiss that she is more than ready to go.

It's like lighting a camp stove. If you just lunge at the stove with a lit match, of course it won't light. If the stove doesn't light, the problem isn't with the match you are using, how you are holding it, or the way you struck the match on the box. It's not a defective camp stove and it doesn't hate you. You just haven't primed it properly. If you focus on thinking that you are doing something wrong during the lighting stage, when the problem is that you haven't primed the stove properly, nothing you do will work. You need to realize that lighting the stove itself is trivial if you have primed it properly.

Before going for the first kiss, you must have done most if not all of the flirting moves with a woman. These are the bare-bones basics. If you haven't done most of these things, don't even consider the first kiss. Go back and do them more. Get the basics handled, then move on.

Testing her readiness for the first kiss

Touching Test. You can test her readiness by gauging her responses to casual and romantic touching. Casual touching is simple and fast. It's when your fingers touch her when you give her a cup of coffee, or when you touch her arm or back to guide her to the table you've selected. Casual touching is ambiguous; you might be touching her as a friend, or you might be touching her as a potential lover.

Romantic touching is more intrusive. If you are touching and holding her hand, or rubbing her arm, or keeping your hand on any part of her body for more than a few seconds, you are touching her romantically. You want her to welcome longer and longer periods of touch from you. First, touch her casually, and see how she responds. More than likely, she will have no visible response at all. If she pulls away at all, keep your touching extremely brief, and keep up your romantic conversations. If she continuously shrugs away from your touch, consider getting rid of her and moving on. There's no reason to stay with a woman who is cold, unresponsive, and doesnÕt want to be romantic with you.

If she does respond positively, touch her for longer periods of time. If she gets more relaxed and animated, if her skin flushes, or her eyes get shiny and reflective, these are all signs of positive response. If she responds positively, move to putting your hand on hers for longer periods. Don't make a big deal of this, just let it seem to happen.

The Hug Test. One way to learn about how a woman feels about you is to see how she responds to being hugged. Like casual touching, hugging is something you can usually get a woman to accept just by doing it. When you hug a woman and don't make a big deal out of it, much of the time she'll just assume that you are a guy who hugs, and not make a big deal out of it either.

We usually recommend avoiding hugging a woman much before you are having sex with her. Hugging is a friendly thing to do, rather than a lover-ly thing to do. If she gets use to being in your arms without kissing you, it's easy for her to resolve the apparent incongruity by telling herself that you are simply a friend.

Also, hugging is a time when men who are starved for touch accidentally show some desperation. They grab a hold, get caught up in how good it feels to them (rather than to her), squeeze too hard, and don't let go. The first rule of hugging a woman that you are dating is that you keep it short. Short, short, short. Use it as a test of her readiness, not as a chance to get your sexual or touch needs met. You'll get enough of that later on.

When saying hello or good-bye to her, you can often simply take her in your arms and hug her. If you keep it short, it won't scare her, and you'll be able to gauge her response. Does she press into you? Does she seem to want to really hang on? That's a good sign, and you might want to move to kissing her right then. If she seems to want to get away, then you know you have more work to do in making her feel romantic feelings.

The face kiss test. Along with hugging, you can try face-kissing. This is when you kiss her cheek, to see how she responds. If she leans into the kiss, and smiles, she's into it, and will be receptive to your lip-kiss later. If she pulls back, or winces, then it's back to the drawing board. She most certainly won't be receptive to a lip-kiss if she won't take one on the cheek willingly.

Enthusiasm test. You can also gauge a woman's level of interest by her level of enthusiasm. Her enthusiasm will be shown in her overall demeanor, but it's best shown in the time between one activity and the next. It's between the activities that you do together, rather than during them, that she has the best opportunity to claim she is tired and needs to go home. Between activities, watch her level of interest. After the movie, is she eager to go out for coffee or a drink, or does she seem reluctant? Does she seem to be looking for a juncture at which she can end the date, or is she up for partying with you all night long? It's these between spaces that will tell you her level of interest.

Pretend Kiss test. This test also primes the woman for your kiss. You begin by moving towards her, as if to kiss her, at some point "change your mind," and back off again. If, as you move toward her, she backs away, she probably doesn't want to kiss you. If she stays still, or moves slightly forward, she's probably interested. The pretend kiss can "seal the deal" for the kiss later. If she hasn't moved away, then you both have acknowledged that a kiss in inevitable, and it's only a matter of time.

How To Be The Man EVERY Woman Wants

By David DeAngelo

I wanted to share a secret to attracting women
that I believe is one of the ULTIMATE advantages
you can have.

When I was first learning about how to get past
my internal fears... how to approach women and start
conversations... how to create attraction and
chemistry... and how to take things to the next
level... I wound up trying a TON of different
"tricks and techniques".

Whenever I found a new "trick" that worked for
me, I felt like I had just put another piece of the
puzzle together... that I had gotten just that
much closer to REALLY understanding how things
worked.

But there was another feeling that happened
even MORE often:

It was when I would try something that had
"worked" before, but it DIDN'T work this time.

It was the feeling that I must have MISSED
something... that I must not REALLY get it.

I'm sure you know exactly what I'm talking
about here.

It was probably a couple of YEARS after starting
my quest that I had what I consider to be one of
the biggest "Ah Ha!" experiences of my life.

Here's what my realization was:

The guys I knew who were the MOST successful
with women didn't read books to learn a bunch of
"pick up lines"... and they didn't rely on tricks
to attract women.

The guys I new who were MOST successful had a
certain something about them that just seemed to
MAGNETICALLY attract women.

In fact, these guys did and said things to
women that seemed like they COULDN'T work to create
attraction.

But it worked. It seemed to ALWAYS work.

At first, I just assumed that these guys must
be good-looking, or have some kind of natural charm
that I would never have.

It seemed like an "unfair advantage".

Well, I learned that it WAS actually an unfair
advantage. But I ALSO learned that it was
something that ANY guy can have.

WARNING: What I'm about to say might sound a
little "new-agey"... but stick with me.

This "Ah Ha!" led me to an even deeper and more
powerful realization:

These men who were consistently successful with
women had a QUALITY about them, and a deep
UNDERSTANDING of how male/female attraction
works...

...SO THEY DIDN'T NEED TECHNIQUES.

Because they had this magical quality, and
because they understood how to direct and channel any
situation and conversation... they created success
without needing the tricks.

In fact, one of my friends who was VERY good
with women started LEARNING some "pick up lines"
and other tricks, and started doing WORSE with
women.
True story.

He had the quality, and the tricks messed it up
for him!

Well, after really digging into this topic and
trying to translate this "secret knowledge"... and
how to develop this quality I speak of... into a
system that a regular guy could "get" use, I
finally create the Master Key.

It's a Master Key that will unlock doors that
NO guy with a bunch of "tricks and techniques" can
open.

It's a key that will attract -- AND KEEP -- the
more desirable and attractive women... the kinds
of women that most guys will NEVER even have a
chance to date.

I could go on and on about it, but if you're
interested in learning more about this key, then
go here and read THIS:

http://www.DoubleYourDatingAdvice.com/e/eBook/

I hope this secret helps you as much as it has
helped me in my success with women.

Talk to you in a couple of days.

Your Friend,

David D.


P.S. You really should take a minute and look
through the list of programs I've created to help
you learn how to attract and meet women. You can
see them all right here, plus watch some KILLER
free video clips as well:

http://www.DoubleYourDatingAdvice.com/e/eBook/

Isolate or Masturbate

I've seen too many guys lose an easy close because they made one critical mistake - they didn't isolate the girl when they had the chance.

Let's look at the basic psychology of females. Women will only go so far with you as long as she's in sight of her friends. As long as she knows her friends are around, the infamous "slut factor" kicks in. 97% of women want to avoid being categorized as a "slut" at all costs. Usually the only thought holding a woman back from getting freaky on you is, "What would my friends think of me if I...?"

You can better understand the social pressures women face if you step into their shoes. Just imagine if you were with a hot babe on the dance floor - but - your parents were in the corner watching your every move. Would you feel comfortable simply grabbing and groping her ASSets and tongue lashing her mouth? Not likely - you'd probably hold back because of what your parents might think.

This doesn't mean that women don't want sex. Women DO want sex. And good sex, if they can get it. Why do you think half of American girls make their trip to Spring Break Mecca every year? Down South their family and friends are one thousand miles away. The social norms are out the window. All of their old anchors are gone. They're free to go wild and crazy and have sex without being labeled a slut. So they just go for it.

Just as on Spring Break, you always must separate the woman you're seducing from her friends and family. You must get her alone and into your world and into your world alone.

I went out with this gorgeous girl from Argentina once, who I met while doing approaches at the mall. Let's call her Tina. I planned to bring Tina home to my pad for a dinner of Salmon and lemon sauce I had carefully prepared the night before. I thought everything was going to be perfect - boy was I wrong!

She called me just before I was about to leave to instead pick her up at the mall. So I drove over. To my surprise, Tina had her FRIEND was with her. This was bad news, because the situation was violating my cardinal principle of ISOLATION.

Tina asked me to give them a ride back to her house. I agreed, thinking that would be the end of it. But once we got back, her friend said she needed a ride home - the problem was, she lived 40 minutes away!

By the time I drove her friend home, the two of them were talking away and then invited more of their friends to come over. It had become a girl's night out and I couldn't make my normal moves. I had been played when I should have put my foot down and ended the adventure as soon as her girlfriends became involved. I never took charged to aggressively isolate her and I had lost the opportunity because of it.

The following month I went out with a cute blonde. We got together in her house and I started playing with her hands and hair in the kitchen. Within a few minutes we were making out against the kitchen sink. At first, I had no intention of leaving the house the way things were going.

Suddenly, one of her prying housemates walked in on us "by accident". Introductions were made and the small talk proceeded. The cute blonde was no longer in the mood to kiss in front of her friend (the slut factor had kicked in) and her housemate didn't look like she was going to go away on her own. This time I took charge of the situation and told my girl in the middle of the conversation, "Jeez, it's getting late - I think we should get going now!" I ran her out of that house away from her friend as fast as I could.

Once I had her isolated - alone - she was free to act her natural, lusty self and the night proceeded superbly from then on.

Don't be one of those guys who loses out from making this one critical mistake. Isolate the girl when you have your chance!

Regards,

Derek Vitalio

Learn the Science of Seduction
http://www.seductionscience.com/

Eight Characteristics that Give a Man the Absolute Best Chance to Score With Women

-- by Mike Pilinski --

© 2003 Kipling Kat Publishing Co. -- All Rights Reserved
http://www.highstatusmale.com/

For a man, successfully meeting women is all about how you ACT. Period. Sure, you have to look halfway decent in the way you dress, stay groomed and not stink like the chunk of two month old polish sausage that I just found hiding in the back of my refrigerator the other day... but the make-or-break factor is and always will be the WORDS that come out of your mouth, and the ATTITUDE that underlies it.

With that in mind, here's eight points to load into your mental backpack when you're getting ready to go off to battle (which is to say, every day of your life...)

1) Remain Focused on the Game -- The art of attracting women is all about knowing how to engage them with a natural curiosity that shows you are at least a little bit interested in *their* world (WARNING: too much = a slick phoney, so be careful). Look for LifeLines (anything that she's hinting she would be open to talking about) and stay committed to working them. Forget about yourself. Fade out your own ego. There'll be plenty of time in the future to gab about your own amazing life.

Remember this: you are NEVER desperately looking for an "ear to bend" -- you are always looking to draw HER out instead. Only those lost souls with limited social contact hungrily crave the attention of any person they can corner into listening to their non-stop yabbering (I'm not trying to sound cruel here, just honest).

Tune out the surrounding world and focus in on her as if you were the only two people in the universe. If done properly (without any subservient whimpering), this kind of attention is flattering to her in an almost breathtakingly way.

2) Stay Calm -- Above all else, act like you're familiar with this whole process. Seduction always begins as a low pressure event. Place her at ease with your laid back demeanor, and let her slowly begin to feed off of it. Be a lighthearted flirt. Don't be obvious -- keep your interest vague so as to give everyone an "out" to protect all egos involved (both yours and hers). She will appreciate your tactful approach immensely, and be impressed with your consideration and charm.

3) Demonstrate Charisma (Likability) -- Sometime during the course of the evening, offer a single simple compliment about something unique to her style and presentation about herself. No canned "You have such beautiful eyes..." compliments. Don't go overboard or make a big deal about ANY compliments that you pay her. Make them seem casual and unplanned (a sudden pleasant thought that just popped into your head and slipped out before you could stop it...), then IMMEDIATELY move on to other topics. Trust me, she heard it.

4) Touch Her To Seduce Her -- Use any excuse you can dream up to get a hand on her. Of course I mean only in the appropriate places... an arm, shoulder, a hair brushback. Do not grope her like a desperate fool. Touch is extremely important because it demonstrates a sexual, "manly" interest in her and keeps you away from the deadly "nice-guy-friend" category. Just make sure you always keep it classy.

5) Risk Taking Is A Turn-On -- Take a chance... a bold comment, break the speed limit, whatever... Stay unpredictable and keep her a little off balance. Men are powerful and at ease with themselves , right? (see item #2...)

6) Be A Man, Not A Boy -- Keep your apartment styled in a mature fashion -- avoid the frat-house look even though your football buddies will probably declare you a big puss. A few REAL house plants (the kind you actually have to water... yee-gads!), and dark solids everywhere. A few *paintings* (don't spend a fortune, just hit the flea markets) instead of the Pam Anderson poster. Got it? Also (very important) junk the "bunk" and get yourself a double-sized bed (because you entertain female company from time to time, that's why) Time to bury the Star Wars bed sheets too. Keep a few bottles of wine in stock and the kind of goodies hiding around the house that a girl would like (popcorn, cheese, ice cream, etc.) for when you want to veg out in front of the tube and get her loosened up.

7) Nurture The Trance Of Romance -- Take her out to see a mushy chick flick by surprise... make a dinner and light a silly candle on a "spontaneous" whim (nothing is spontaneous to a real Seducer...). Do the things that trigger those romantic thoughts and dreams that attract women naturally by pulling up all their fuzziest memories. You'll score major points for creativity!

8) Project The Attitude Of The High Status Male -- You must NEVER allow yourself to act like a fawning "nice guy"... but you always want to SEEM like one (for an in-depth examination of this all-important topic read this free article on my site... http://www.highstatusmale.com/article_015.htm ). Imagine you have a harem waiting for you back home, and you're trying to determine if she would make a nice new addition. I'm serious. This is the kind of unspoken "winners" attitude that you must keep burning in the far recesses of your mind at all times when you're dating women.

Assume that she likes you and will respond favorably to your charm, but never assume you have a green light to start telling fart jokes or break into your full blown comedy club routine. Humor is all about the CLEVER observation of the absurdities of everyday life -- not the repeating of dumb jokes you read in Hustler or doing your lame celebrity impressions... ("Do I make you horny baby?") That's why they call it a SENSE of humor... you need to base your wit on what you *sense* to be going on around you, which often lies beneath the obvious.

So there you have it. Try a few of these attitude adjustments for yourself -- maybe just as an experiment if you can't face the idea of actually changing anything permanently about yourself. Let me know what happens.

Download Your Free Copy of M. Gary Neuman's The Truth About Cheating

Download Your Free Copy of M. Gary Neuman's The Truth About Cheating

In The Truth About Cheating, M. Gary Neuman explores why men stray and what you can do to prevent it.

Between now and 7 p.m. PST Friday, September 12, 2008, you can download a free copy of this book.

Download your copy now!
To download the book:

• If you're on a PC, right-click (Mac users: Ctrl-click) on the link above. Internet Explorer users, select Save Target As; Firefox users, select Save Link As.
• Select where you wish to save the file on your computer, and then click on Save.
• Once the file has been saved, go to the location where you saved the file and open it to begin reading.
  

This book is copyrighted. You may view and download the file, but you may not copy the file or share or forward it to any other person.

Dealing With TESTS From Women

***QUESTION FROM A READER***

Hi David,

I attended your first seminar in LA and it was a real
eye opener for me. I've listened to the advanced CD
series 2 times since then and each time I'm learning
something new. I've noticed that the trick is to go
out and gain experience meeting more women and then
come back and listen to the CDs again and you'll be
surprised how much more you're picking up. After
attending your seminar I'm now able to start a conversation
with a woman in a bookshop and get her to follow me
from there to another location to have coffee\tea
etc, and I'm now able to this on a CONSISTENT basis,
something I didn't think was possible before.

My question to you is regarding answering (or not
answering) questions from women. I now understand
that if you directly answer 'qualifying' questions
from a woman then you're accepting her qualifying
frame, which is VERY bad for attraction. But how
about questions that seem like she's genuinely trying
to get to know you better? Also how do handle it when
a woman says, "You never answer my questions..." and
then goes on and on about it? I've had this kind of
situation many times, I know it's a sh**-test but I
haven't found an effective way of dealing with it yet.

For an example of this kind of test please read the
chat below which is an excerpt from an online chat I
had recently. I met her online but we've spoken on
the phone several times, she lives in a different
country from me so we haven't been able to meet yet,
but plan to do so soon. Not so much for this particular
chick but I would like to know how to deal with this
kind of situation with any chick in future.

Tell me what you think, and if I handled her questions
(and accusations) properly and what I could have done
better.

With thanks.

Your loyal student.

G. (London, England)


==================messenger convo=================

[Good initial C&F conversation, then she asked the
question]
.
.
Her: how many girls have you met from online so far?
Me: 5000
Her: it's a minus, that u never answer to my
questions
Her: but it's true, that u never answer to my
questions
Me: really?
Her: hm...... every time I ask you something about
u....you just answer with a slapstick something
Me: You know my name, where I live, my age, where
I had the craziest sex etc etc
Me: you want more?
Me: wow! there are greedy people in this world
Me: still there?
Her: yes.... I was just thinking what to say
Me: aha you're lost for words
Her: I don't want you to get me wrong here......
Me: shoot away!
Her: but I have the impression that you don't want
to talk about your outlook on relationships....
Her: that sounds weird
Her: are you dating somebody right now?
Me: outlook on relationships?
Me: is this a marriage proposal... you've got to be
rich though
Me: and be able to tell a story for 40 days and 40
nights
Her: here it comes again..... no, I'm just interested
in getting to know you.....
Me: I like to get to know u too
Me: of course you've got to be a great story teller
Me: then the marriage will be ON
Her: so, then why is it so bad to ask maybe how long
your longest relationship was... or when u did get
out of the last one....
Me: you think it's bad?
Her: I really love fooling around and chatting
around....but I don't like it if I never get answers
to just normal not indiscreet questions
Me: Indiscreet... hmmm. Ask whatever questions you
want
Me: you'll get to know me as it goes
Her: I already did.... and I don't have a list to
write that down.... I just noticed that... last time
when you called me on the phone... and today, too......
every time I ask something about your past I get a slapstick
answer
Me: don't mind me that's how I talk. I'm playful
but we'll get to know each other as we go along
Me: it's a natural process
Me: you can't force it
Her: hey..... now you got me wrong..... see I didn't
want that
Me: want what?
Her: that you get this message the way you got it.....
I'm not that needy and I don't want to force anything.
Me: cool, I like that...
Me: needy people scare me
Me: I know you're not needy
Me: so when are u thinking of coming?
Her: I told you.... it would not be possible before
march because in Feb. I'm on training... and work...
and will have no (NO!!) day off the whole month
Me: working all month, not even free for the weekends?
Her: no....
Me: what training is it?
Her: especially not the weekends..... from march on I
will have a little bit more time (especially the
weekends)
Her: I worked on getting me free time on weekends
because I want to have a private life again one day....
Me: time to go out and stuff
Her: I'm doing my A-licence for aqua-training the
next 3 weeks, and then the last diploma for Pilates
Her: for example
Me: you're going to put me through some steps when
you get here
Her: put you through some steps?
Me: workouts... were you thinking of something
else... bad girl!
Her: no... I just wanted to know what you want to
learn...what where you thinking about
Me: whatever is nice and easy, anyway we'll see when
come
Me: what are you uo to next tonight
Me: up
Her: not much.... watch a movie maybe and then go to
bed.....
Me: ok, hope you get better wrap warm.
Me: I've got to hit the sack now
Me: tired from a long day at work
Her: do that.... and talk to you soon.... just
have to work 2 hours tomorrow night.... I need that
break, maybe I'll cancel that, too and stay in bed
Her: nite nite then......xx
Me: good night


>>>MY COMMENTS:

Great job!

It's good hearing from you, "G". I remember you
very clearly from the LA seminar... and I remember
the breakthrough you had.

Congratulations on getting to the next level. It's
exciting to hear that you can now go out to a bookstore
and get a woman to join you for tea on the spot on
a consistent basis. Nice!

On to your questions...

First of all, let's talk about the whole concept
of "testing", and why women do it (and, more importantly,
how to deal with it when it happens).

In a nutshell, "testing" is a woman's way of QUICKLY
finding out a lot of information with a very small
investment.

You must remember that beautiful women are being
approached ALL THE TIME in one way or another... just
about every man they meet tries to pick them up or
come on to them.

Women can FEEL this happening, even before it actually
starts.

Now, if a woman is "available", she must figure
out a way to "separate the men from the boys" so to
speak, and figure out if a particular man is going
to be worth her time.

Enter the TEST.

Also, if an attractive woman is out on a date with
a man, or having a phone conversation, etc. (or anything
else that could be perceived as taking things to the
next level) she must find out quickly whether this
particular guy is:

1) Long-term relationship material
2) Short-term "affair" material
3) Friend material
4) Wuss material
5) The Gimp from Pulp Fiction

Keep in mind, a beautiful woman has LOTS of options.
She's being approached probably 100+ times a month
with date offers, etc. and could never hope to spend
even a small fraction of her time with all the men
who are interested in her.

She must use TESTS to quickly cut to the chase
and find out what a particular guy is REALLY all about.

Tests can take many forms.

Here are a few common ones:

1) Canceling plans with little notice, or flaking
out entirely without notice

2) Asking for gifts or favors outright

3) Acting snotty, demanding, dramatic, or manipulative
to see if you'll put up with it

4) Asking or telling you to change your behavior

5) Threatening to leave or take her attention and
give it to someone else if you don't comply with her
wishes

...and the list goes on.

As you already know, women often use more SUBTLE
tests as well.

For instance, complaining that you don't answer
her directly, to see if you will.

Or telling you that what you're doing is annoying
to her.

In your email, you wrote...

"But how about questions that seem like she's genuinely
trying to get to know you better? Also how do handle
it when a woman says, "You never answer my questions..."
and then goes on and on about it? I've had this kind
of situation many times, I know it's a sh**-test but
I haven't found an effective way of dealing with it
yet."

...well, the good news for you is that you know
a guy who has had this happen A LOT more times to
him...and that person is ME!

And the "effective" way to deal with it is to keep
doing exactly what you're doing.

The "problem" here is how you're interpreting the
situation.

My guess is that all of the problems you're having
around this issue come from the fact that you "see"
it as a problem... not because there actually IS a
problem.

Here's a little chunk of the dialogue that you
included with your email...


Her: I really love fooling around and chatting around....
but I don't like it if I never get answers to just
normal not indiscreet questions

Me: Indiscreet... hmmm. Ask whatever questions you
want

Me: you'll get to know me as it goes

Her: I already did.... and I don't have a list to
write that down.... I just noticed that... last time
when you called me on the phone... and today, too......
every time I ask something about your past I get a
slapstick answer

Me: don't mind me that's how I talk. I'm playful but
we'll get to know each other as we go along

Me: it's a natural process

Me: you can't force it


...OK.


The way I read this, you GAVE IN when she started
complaining, and said "...don't mind me that's how
I talk...".

You basically said "Don't mind me, I'm actually
kind of a Wuss, and that's how I talk".

Are you with me here?

You didn't need to EXPLAIN yourself, or make an
excuse for yourself.

What I'm trying to say is that YOU are the problem
here, not the women who complain about you not answering
their questions.

Try this instead:


Her: I already did.... and I don't have a list to
write that down.... I just noticed that... last time
when you called me on the phone... and today, too......
every time I ask something about your past I get a
slapstick answer

Me: I'm glad you like it. Maybe that's why you keep
messaging me and thinking about me so much!


...see the difference here?

If a woman complains because you're being difficult,
LAUGH. Pretend you're a bad little boy on the school
playground, and you just pulled her hair... and she's
upset with you...

What would the little boy do?

He'd laugh... and then snap her bra!

Keep things fun. Don't let her change your direction
or upset your mood.

You absolutely CANNOT turn into a Wuss and start
explaining yourself.

There's ALWAYS a better way to do things.

For example...

Let's say you've decided that the woman you're
talking to is really starting to get annoyed, and
you want to give her a little chunk of info.

Instead of saying "Don't mind me", say "OK, I'm
27 years old, I work for an accounting firm, I pay
my own rent, I wear socks that match, and I love my
mom... is that better? How boring is that?"

In other words, TELL HER what she wants to know,
but say it in a sarcastic way that also says "Fine,
you're boring and since you can't think of anything
fun to talk about, I'll answer you... Brat".

Keep in mind... this whole style of communication
is VERY different from what most guys do... and it's
often surprising to a woman.

When she kicks and screams a bit, it's usually
because she's genuinely surprised. But don't mistake
her whining for REAL resistance.

If she actually gets upset and doesn't want to
talk to you anymore just because you didn't answer
her questions, and instead busted her balls a bit,
then let her go. You learned something VERY valuable,
and you didn't even have to marry her to learn it.

Also, when a woman starts resisting your evasive
and humorous comments...

...LAUGH!

Have fun.

You need to learn to enjoy yourself during this
process. It sounds to me like you're letting this
stuff get to you... which is NOT useful.

By the way... there was something you said to this
girl that I absolutely LOVED...


Her: are you dating somebody right now?

[deleted comment that was out of sync]

Me: is this a marriage proposal... you've got to be
rich though


...this is great!

She asks if you're dating someone, and you ask
her if she's proposing! And then you said "You've
got to be rich, though".

Now THAT'S the right way to answer a question
like that one.

Nice!

To finish, I'm going to do something a little bit
unconventional, and include another email that I just
received from a guy in Australia (He has the same
first initial as you... I wonder if there's a relation...).

Read this:

"You ROCK,

Since I am new to your publication I am unsure if
you get much mail from Australia.

What a difference a week makes. Last Saturday I had
a date with a great young lady. Smart, sexy, beautiful
etc. Well the 1st date didn't go to badly, some passionate
kissing and fun, but when it came time to try to take
her top off, the answer was a firm NO. That is where
the night ended.

Mustn't have been too bad cause I got a follow up
date the next Friday, but I also got the cold(ish)
shoulder. What she didn't know is I got you book
on Wednesday. Wow, what a difference. I realised
she was lining me up for the hoop jumping as a potential
"long term relationship" and sex was at least three
dates away-way too far.

She was playing games, but your book came to the rescue.
When i phoned her to make the date, she said "I will
PENCIL you in". Well in my old ways I would have said
"Yeah sure", but there is a new Greg with Double Your
Dating Power. When she tried the line I came back with
"Well let me know. I am a busy man, if you can't make
it, I need to know-NOW."

When I picked her up, she kissed me on the cheek (after
playing tonsil hockey the week before, was a little
strange). So I put your strategies into play.

I didn't touch her for 4 hours, didn't hit on her,
didn't look at her, was very standoffish. Went out
of my way to point out her strange behaviour. At
one stage I called her "A walking contradiction".
When she went down the "But it will change our friendship
if we take this further (read long term relationship)
path-I said "That's fine, I just want to have a little
FUN."

When I finally did kiss her she melted. Only for me
to stop after about 45 seconds. I then didn't touch
her again for about 1/2 an hour.

She finally took her own top off (I couldn't budge
it 6 days before) and then she said "I will make you
a deal, if I take a piece of clothing off, then you
must take one off as well. She was chasing me!!!!

Well we undresses and had a great time for about three
hours. Afterwards, she invited me out! Love your stuff.
Must go and re-read your wonderful words again. I can't
wait to get the DVD's.

Regards,


G.

ps So if any of you want to come over here, know it
works and works really well. And there are plenty
of great looking women.

G."


...OK, so I included this story because I wanted
to demonstrate a different aspect of testing, and
of "passing" this kind of testing with FLYING colors.

Often, a woman will test you by RESISTING you,
or by telling you that "things are moving too fast"
or even by asking you what your intentions are with
her long term (when you've only known her a short
while, and have no intentions of any kind).

What this gentleman above did was to SEE her bet,
and then RAISE her.

He called her bluff, basically.

WOMEN LOVE THIS!

It INSTANTLY shifts the power from one side to
the other, and totally changes the situation around.

Points I'd like to comment on:

1) The first time you saw her, you kissed. When you
tried to take off her top, the answer was a "firm
NO".

>>>The reason why the answer was a "firm NO" was because
you gave her something to resist. Instead of amplifying
the ATTRACTION in the situation, and building the
ANTICIPATION, you just went for it. Next time, you'll
know better.

2) The second time you saw her, you didn't do anything
that even LIGHTLY indicated that you were interested
in her.

>>>Great job! This is perfect. Most guys can't go
four MINUTES without screwing things up by trying
to kiss a woman, asking her how she's feeling, or
doing some other Wuss Bag thing that blows everything.
You were able to stay cool and calm for FOUR HOURS...
and allow the tension to build. I guarantee you that
she was wondering what the hell was going on.


3) When you finally did kiss her, you STOPPED after
45 seconds... then didn't do anything else for a half
hour.

>>>Again, great move. Perfect. It doesn't surprise
me at ALL that she took her own top off, then told
you that you had to take something off as well. This
is what happens when you understand the process by
which women test... and the process by which women
become sexually aroused.

...thanks for the email.


Now, in this newsletter I've focused on the topic
of TESTING. I've also discussed amplifying attraction,
and eliminating resistance from women.

The reason that these two guys who wrote in are
doing so well right now is because they understand
something that most guys DON'T understand.

They "get it".

And, like most of the people I've met in life who
are trying to be the best they can be, they're always
looking to improve. They're continuing to educate
themselves, even though they have a level of success
that most men would envy.

It took me about three or four YEARS to finally
"get it", and to have total confidence that I could
go out anywhere, anytime, and meet women.

That was partly because I couldn't find any good
models to learn from... and partly because I had to
"unlearn" a lot of bad programming I had obtained
along the way.

The reason I wrote my original eBook "Double Your
Dating" was because I wanted to be able to help other
guys out there to understand how to be successful
with women and dating... without having to go through
all the hassles and wasted time that I had to deal
with.

My Advanced Dating Techniques CD/DVD program is
the natural extension...

It allowed me to go "deep" and spend a lot more
time teaching the "inner game", as well as the "outer
game" and specific techniques for meeting and dating
women. It also allowed me the opportunity to interview
some of the guys I know who are REALLY good with women...
and get them to share many of the great ideas that
I learned from them that helped me become successful.

In other words, my eBook and Advanced Program are
the BEST. They're what I wish I would have had when
I started learning this stuff... and they probably
would have saved me YEARS of my time, and a lot of
frustration.

I invite you to check them out.

You can download my online eBook and be reading
it within a few minutes here:

http://www.DoubleYourDatingAdvice.com/e/eBook/


I'll talk to you again soon!

Your Friend,

David D.

What Women Want... and Other Things That Us Guys Will Never Really Know

"What Women Want... and Other Things That Us Guys Will Never Really Know"

I want to take a moment to make a couple of things clear before we get into the mailbag.

1) I don't believe that all women are the same. Even though I sometimes sound like it because I tend to generalize, I believe that there are some really wonderful women out there...

But in general, I think that most women in our culture (I live in America) have certain socially programmed ideas and ways of dealing with men.

In addition to that, I'm also convinced that women are wired differently from birth... and in such a way that causes a very complex set of drives, desires, goals, and even ways of dealing with the world.

I don't claim to be a relationship expert.

I teach men how to be more successful with women and dating... not women and marriage.

My perspective is that too many men who want a great, fulfilling long term relationship wind up settling for one that's not satisfying... just because they don't know how to get any different or better.

If you want to find a really exceptional girl to have a relationship with, you're probably going to have to meet several dozen women to get to her. And by mastering what it's taken me years to learn and figure out, you can get there a lot faster.

And of course, if you're at a point in your life where you just want to be free and single, and you want to meet a lot of women, that's great too. It's your life, so you'd better do something to enjoy it!

On with the mailbag...


***QUESTION***

"I have a great job, creative hobbies, well above average income, good health, reasonable looks,
community status, many friends, and a romantic and pleasant kind and gentle personality. Published songwriter, author, poet, an overachiever perhaps in hobbies, hi IQ, no vices, no smoking, no drugs, modestly religious. I live in a small ski and golf resort town in North California. I also happen to be 5'6" tall.

On 20/20 on TV they showed a program that revealed outrageous bias against short people in hiring and romance (I don't want short kids! she said) and they could not beg borrow buy or steal a woman to date a short guy. I this true, or am I just having bad luck in a small town? Yes I'm on net, but the respondents tend to be 1000 miles away or just foreigners trying to get citizenship. Any advice except "be patient" as friend tell me?

F."

>MY COMMENTS: Before I answer your question, I have to point out something... I beg to differ with you on the "no vices" thing. You like to talk too much about yourself! lol...

But seriously... yes, it seems that there is a bias towards taller people in this world. They are
perceived as smarter, more honest, harder working, more dominant... they make more money, they command more respect... and most of all...

If you think that just because this is true that you don't have a chance, you're wrong.

I'm really glad you wrote in, because I get this question a lot.

Here's my experience. I have no less than 5 friends who are all around 5'4 - 5'7, who ALL are VERY successful with women. And I don't just mean that these guys get a date once in awhile. I mean then go out with a LOT more women than most of the other guys I know.

And I can think of several guys I know who are over 6 feet tall that almost NEVER have women around them.

Just because a bias exists doesn't mean that it has to affect YOU negatively. If another guy is taller, then you can be more interesting. If you meet a girl that only dates taller men, say "next."

I've been dating a woman for quite awhile now who's taller than me. She likes taller guys herself. But do I care? Hell no.

You'd be much better off looking for all the reasons that women will PREFER you than looking at the biases against you.

And, most importantly, remember: Your personality is FAR more important than your looks in the long run.


***COMMENT***

"Dr. D,

As cheezy as it sounds, you've changed my life, buddy. I was VERY skeptical when I bought your book... thought it was an Internet scam. I've been studying your book for 6 months now, and KNOWLEDGE IS POWER....thanks for all the insight. Okay, enough 'penis petting'...eck. I wanted to write you and get your opinion of the movie "What Women Want" with Mel Gibson. Figured you'd have been the first guy to tackle it. Anyways, the movie kind of transforms Mel into this 'kiss-ass' for women, reading their minds and telling them what they want to hear. By doing this, he changes his image from a**hole to sensitive gay-guy friend, and women can't get enough of him! Interesting... anyways, the message that it portrays seems like it's the anti-christ of all that you stand for, Dave. Wanted to bring it to your attention. For the record, it WAS worth
watching....just like 'The Rules' was worth reading - as you mentioned in your book. Thanks again for your mailbags and all the pearls of wisdom! Keep up the good work.

-T"

>MY COMMENTS: Two things:

1) Don't ever say the words "penis petting" again.

2) I haven't seen the movie "What Women Want" yet, but from what I hear, you'd be better off learning how to pick up women from watching "Shallow Hal."

Of course, if you don't learn anything watching Shallow Hal, it's not a total loss. At least you'll learn a few cool dance moves.


***COMMENT FROM A WOMAN***

"Dear mr david,

well i'm sorry to tell you, that not all girls feel they need to have the guy pay for everything and have men "give" their power away to them, it might just be that this guy or guys, likes her pure and simple and they enjoy each others company...shes not conspiring against him in a plot for
destruction.....lol.

of course there may be others girls out there that is exactly like you described, but the way you sounded, it was like no matter who that girl was, they were all out to get the same thing

yours sincerely j."

>MY COMMENTS: You've made a great point. Not all women are like this. There are those rare women who are that perfect combination of mature and cool that are an absolute pleasure to spend time with.

And based on your response to me, you're probably one of them.

How would I know?

Because you've responded with a non-defensive, funny answer that goes straight to the point.

Think about how this woman comes across compared to the one who I responded to last week...

This here is a woman who wants to speak her mind, but doesn't need my approval one way or another. She's happy with her life, and want's to contribute. Take note.

And by the way, why didn't you ask me for my number?


***QUESTION***

"David,

I really need your help. I've been love with a girl I work with for about a year and a half. The problem was to begin with she had a boyfriend. Last summer she broke up with him because the guy is a real jerk. He hits on her and yells at her. He's very possessive and thinks everything should be his way. Well me and her went out a couple of times and we both had really a great time. She is amazing to me and I love her so much.

We never really talked about going out like (bf/gf) because we are really good friends and I didn't want to screw things up and not even be friends with her. She told a couple of her friends that she really did like me and would like to have a relationship with me. She never really talked to me about it though.

Then she gives me a letter saying she really does like me, but that I obviously don't feel the same and that she is going to get back with her old boyfriend. (I Should've Kicked Myself!) They have been back together since about October and it is driving me crazy. I can't stand seeing her with him, I don't understand why she went back with him after the way he treated her. She still flirts and we talk and spend time together at work, but then she said that He said he didn't like her being so close to me,and that she couldn't lie to him.

So we were kinda quiet for a while. Now we are back to really talking again and I just want to get her away from him. I can't stand him, He comes to our workplace and tries to sneak around and see her. I always find out though. It's just really bothering me because I really do care for her and don't want to see her hurt.

She doesn't seem as happy either she sits around and just stares sometimes and just seems unhappy. So tell me what you think into this matter. And any suggestions and advice you may have.

Thanks,

E."

>MY COMMENTS: Well, unfortunately for you, you're most likely in a situation that leaves you no way of winning.

Your story is painful to read. But it's a story that is played out every day, all over the world:

Woman stays with abusive jerk, and passes on nice, caring guy who would treat her like a princess.

And why does this happen?

I'll tell you why.

It's because she feels something inside of herself that she can't control, doesn't understand, and cannot stop.

It's called ATTRACTION.

Attraction isn't logical. Attraction doesn't make sense.
Attraction is not chosen.

And, worst of all, it often happens to women when they meet guys who are horrible to them.

Do yourself a favor, and go rent the old movie "A Streetcare Named Desire" with Marlon Brando.

That was the movie that put him on the map as a major sex symbol. While you're watching it, keep asking yourself "What could it be about this arrogant, uneducated, abusive guy who rapes his sister in law that women find IRRESISTABLY SEXY AND ATTRACTIVE?"

I know, I know... it's enough to make you say "Hm."

In any event, you would do well to learn the aspects of your personality that you can amplify and enhance so that women start showing this kind of attraction towards you. I know a good place to start...

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/ebook/

(Hint, hint)


***COMMENT***

"well dave,

this is my first letter to you but i guess there's good reason for me writing this. I recently had a devastating experience with a girl who i thought was "the one" LOL anyway, i went through the whole motion of being sick. i even resorted to begging...(what was i thinking!!) well anyway i started to read your emails and my confidence had shot up dramatically, using your tips iv been out with four girls in 2 months and they're all soooo hot!!

They're calling me back to go out and the girl who i though was the one she sees me all the time and i think the fact im happy seems to have shocked her....she seems interested again...luckily I'm not anymore!!! Haha

well anyway just thought id say thanx

youre a star"

>MY COMMENTS: Over the holidays, I saw a friend who has been having some problems with his girlfriend. I told him "If you were dating three other great women right now, you wouldn't be in turmoil, wondering what to do right now."

I admire you for admitting that you resorted to begging her to take you back. That's a tough one. I'm sure that there are a LOT of guys who can identify.

Next time this kind of thing happens, you'll respond a little differently, huh?

***QUESTION***

"Dave,

enjoying the emails very much and thinking about getting your book!

My question: I'm British, living in London, and I get the impression that you and your correspondents are in America.

I'm not sure how well your material is going to work over here, because of small but important differences in language, behaviour and culture.

Could you possibly tell me if you've addressed this question anywhere? Or if you've had feedback from any Brits?

Thanks again."

>MY COMMENTS: I'm glad you asked this question... I wrote this book based on my experiences here in the USA.

But since releasing my book, I've been selling more and more of them to guys all over the world.

I had two today... one from Denmark, and one from Australia. And I've had guys from just about everywhere you can think of order it and report back that this stuff works everywhere. You may have to tailor some things to your particular local style, but I'm becoming more and more convinced that the psychology is universal. And, of course if you're not happy with your purchase I offer a 100% no-questions-asked no-risk refund policy. If you're not happy with the materials, just email for a refund. But I'm confident that you'll be happy, and that you'll learn a lot of very valuable techniques.


***QUESTION***

In terms of places to pick up chicks, I agree bars and nightclubs are very difficult. My friends and I are athletic college age guys and have never had much success at bars. Nightclubs we do all right but parties and everyday places are the best for meeting girls cause they don't have their guards up and won't feel like a slut in front of their friends if they give you their number or go out with you that night or go home with you.

My question is why in your letters do you always insist on getting the email address. The good looking girls I know think that's unusually corny and pathetic when I guy hits on them and asks them for their email address or says he'll look it up on their school webpage directory.

Nevertheless getting the phone number seems like the way to go but how do you get it without coming off too aggressive (I realize getting the email's easy cause you don't come off as being aggressive or pushy, and then you casually tell em to throw their phone number down too, but at the same time it still seems kinda corny?)

any opinion I'd love to hear

J. who's looking to land a hottie."

>MY COMMENTS: Asking for email is actually very cool. Just don't ask with a whiny, unsure tone of voice.

"Hey, do you have email?"

It's so easy.

Why do I like email?

Simple. Go out and get 10 phone numbers from women and then call them. 8 out of 10 times you'll get a machine. 5 or 6 out of 8 times you leave a message you won't get a call back. (I'm guessing based on a lot of personal experience)

Now go out and get 10 email addresses, and follow up a day later with a quick email. You'll get probably 6-8 of those back. No chasing women. No calling ten times. No messages. It's great. Try it, you'll like it.

And once you have an email relationship, a woman will be MUCH warmer towards you when you do talk and meet again.

(In my book I give exact words to use when you follow up by email, and exactly what to do on page 81)


***QUESTION***

"What kind of stuff/subjects does a guy have to talk about to a girl if he wants to attract a girl he has just met, and also to make girls enjoy your company, in other words what kind of subjects make girls laugh and hence always look forward to your company?"

>MY COMMENTS: Talk about ANYTHING other than what you do for a living, where you grew up, where you went to school, who you know, and where you live.

Try talking about current affairs in a cocky, funny way. Make fun of the worlds most famous people in an entertaining way.

Say "So don't you just love that new Britney Spears song 'I'm A Slave 4U'? I love it when she says "All you people look at me like I'm a little girl..." I mean, every time I look at her with her pubic area hanging out of her low cut jeans that's exactly what I'm thinking."

Or... "How much says Michael Jordan insists on a Pre-Nuptial agreement next time?"

Once again, the magic formula: Cocky+Funny


***COMMENT***

"Thanks a million Dave. Since I began to use these methods success has been very easy. Women I have been wanting for years before are now wanting me. I transfered the frustration that comes along with the confusion of not knowing if a person is interested or not, has the power,
and etc etc etc.... A guy at my age with the knowledge that I have about women has a hell of a good forecast.

With your methods and my personality I feel complete when it comes to dating women. One of the biggest problems I have is guys who hate that fact that I have it good with ALL women.

However, I want to comment on last weeks****EMAIL OF THE WEEK, FROM A WOMAN**** I hate people such as her. Obviously, she thinks she know everything about the damn world but in reality she does not know sh**. (excuse my language) I bet some lame guy has filled her head up with nonsense. To top it off, at the end she goes, "You can't have my digits" uh! I bet she was thinking, "I just burst his bubble " and "I bet he is just like every other guy I know that has a GED. He will believe me and began to want me" That was very funny."

>MY COMMENTS: Thanks for the support. We all know she wants me... lol. You know, I never did hear back from her...


***COMMENT***

"Hi,

I'm not quite sure how I got on your mailing list, but I have enjoyed reading your e-mails. However, It is rather obvious that your "reader's letters" are contrived by you for the purpose of writing on a specific issue. All the letters begin by describing the success they have realized since buying your book, followed by a situation YOU wish to address. This tactic is an interesting
marketing ploy, and I'm sure it is very effective, congratulations!

So I have a challenge for you, include this letter (along with the appropriate bashing) in your next e-mail, and I will take your advise more seriously.

D."

>MY COMMENTS: lol... well, you asked for it...

I don't invent ANY of the letters that I include in my Mailbag, Q&A, or anything else. They are all real. As a matter of fact, my biggest problem is that I get WAAAYYY too much email, and I have a lot of people that get upset every week because their letters aren't included!

I would say that I get in the neighborhood of 1,000 emails a month right now, and I have to skim them to find interesting content for my newsletters.

Here's why I include so many testimonials:

1) It's important to me that my readers hear from people who are using the materials and getting results. This encourages them to keep learning and improving.

2) I like it when a person tells me what's working for them, and then asks a question. If you want to improve your chances of getting into the mailbag, tell me how you're doing first, then ask your question.


***QUESTION***

"Dave, you should get a nobel prize or something, you're techniques are pure genious. I always had a funny attitude and I think I was a little cocky to begin with so I had a leg up on the competition. You're tips really helped me though, I talk to any girl I want comfortably and I always usually know what to say to get them laughing. With your book on my side, I'm invincible. Anyway, I have a few questions so let me begin... 1) I just broke up with my
girlfriend (on good terms) and while I'm done moping around (C'mon guys I know you all went through that stage) I sure wouldnt mind getting back together with her and by the sounds of what here friends say she wouldn't mind either. Can you give me some tips on talking to her again and trying to form that mystique that would draw her in?

2) Could you just add in some more of those funny first comments that can make a lady puddy in your (my) hands?

Thanks a bunch,

J."

>MY COMMENTS: Speaking of contrived-sounding compliments...
Thank you.

To answer your questions, if I were you, I would remember that NOT BEING PREDICTABLE is very attractive. So as you're learning how to be cocky and funny, remember that this girl has certain expectations of you. Start doing things that she doesn't expect, and responding differently than you did before... while acting more like a challenge.

As far as what to say to a woman that will make her turn into "puddy in your hands"...

I think "putty" is spelled with two t's, isn't it?

Whatever.

I would focus more on the "how" than the "what." In other words, you need to learn how to say ANYTHING in a way that causes a woman to feel attracted to you.

You need to learn to say things in a way that is both slightly arrogant and DAMN FUNNY at the same time. If you can get a woman saying in her mind "This guy is a little bit too confident... but he's really funny. I can't tell if he's serious or not" then you've got it. Think about it.

I'll let you know when they call me about the Nobel Prize for my book. You never know... could happen.

"Uhhhh... Uhhhhh Hey Beavith, check out thith kool medal I got for teaching guys how to pick up chicks!"

"Yea Yea! Kool!"

OK, enough childish humor...

As usual, if you haven't taken advantage of my downloadable eBook "Double Your Dating" then I'd HIGHLY recommend that you do that now. Everything will make more sense after you read it. It also comes with three free bonus booklets that will teach you all about personalities that are attractive to women, how to turn women on sexually, and how to go from one step to the next when it's time to get physical. Go to:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/ebook/

...now and download your copy. You'll love it.

I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David D

A "Secret" Body Language Women Find Irresistible

A "Secret" Body Language Women Find Irresistible

If you'd like to take a look at all of the different programs I've created to help you learn how to meet women... plus watch video clips of each of them, just go here:

http://www.DatingTechniques.com/Catalog

***DATING QUESTION FROM A READER***

Hello Dave,

I want to say thank you for the Advanced CD Series.

The more I listen to it, the more I get out of it. Its like when you watch a movie about 53 times, you'll always find something new that you didn't notice the previous times you watched it. When I first invested on your book, I thought that it was fantastic chic bible, now that I've invested in the CD Series, I understand more of what you talk about in the book. The DVD Series is next...as soon as I get the ins...lol.

Anyway, to my question. You talk about how body language will affect the moment, if you will, while conversing with a woman. Perhaps I still do not understand how the process works, or maybe its
just one of those things that men aren't supposed to understand, but if you're talking with a woman, oh lets say at a baseball game, somewhere where friends may spot you, and you wonder off to your friends without her as if "you don't care," you say it is creating tension between the two of you,
because she's wondering "where the hell did he go?" but is that not creating some sort of negative body language in a way at the same time?

A little help understanding this will greatly be appreciated, Dave. I'm sure I'm not the only one who doesn't capture this concept. Thanks again. D. Yuma, Arizona

MY COMMENTS:

Thanks for your email, this is a great question.

I think that the reason you don't "get" this particular concept is because you're trying to fit what I'm teaching you into your way of seeing the world, instead of the other way around.

You're looking for how I'm WRONG instead of how I'm RIGHT.

And I'll bet you dimes to dollars that you have not spent much time TESTING what you've learned in the real world.

I can sit here all day long and explain to you what it's like to drive a car. I can tell you how it's different steering a car when you're driving 5 miles per hour than it is when you're driving 55 miles per hour... and how it's different to back up because you have to think in reverse...

...and you could ask me questions like "Well, how do you mean it's "backwards" when you back up? Wouldn't it just feel the same?" and "Wouldn't it be distracting to turn your windshield wipers on while it's raining and you're trying to drive?"...

...and I could answer all of your questions...

...OR...

...you could just get in a damn car and go see what it's like to drive!

If you want to "capture this concept" you need to get out in the real world and DO IT.

In your example above, you asked if you're also creating "some sort of negative body language" at the same time by walking away from a woman.

What do you mean by "negative"?

And if it WORKS, WHO CARES?

Do you mean that if you walk away from a girl that you're talking to, are you going to make her think you don't like her?

GOOD, if she thinks that. Who cares?

If you walk away from a woman because you want to go talk to your friends, it's HER DEAL if she doesn't like it. Not yours.

If, on the other hand, you see your friends, but DON'T go talk to them because you don't want to offend the girl you're talking to, you're going to probably also give her several clues that you're a WUSSBAG, and that you don't have any spine or life of your own... and that you like to live in a way that pleases other people.

And guess what?

That is NOT an attractive quality.

Look...

Everything is a trade-off in one way or another.

Everything involves risk.

Everything you do can backfire.

Most guys are painfully aware of these issues.

But, the problem is that most guys take this knowledge and use it the WRONG WAY.

Instead of doing what WORKS, and not caring if it "backfires" or "fails" in that particular situation, they do the "safe" thing.

Of course, anytime you "play it safe" around an attractive woman by being a "nice guy" and trying to "follow her lead" you are almost ABSOLUTELY going to do something that's going to backfire on you MOST of the time.

In other words, by playing it safe and being a "nice" guy, you won't get any "negative" responses or "rejection" in the moment.

But, she's NEVER going to feel ATTRACTION for you, either (unless you look like Brad Pitt, or you're in ColdPlay).

The answer?

Before I tell you, I want to suggest that you don't understand one other KEY element of creating ATTRACTION with a woman. And you can learn about that key element by going HERE:

http://www.DatingTechniques.com/OnBeingAMan


Stop worrying about "failing" or doing something that doesn't work.

It doesn't MATTER if you "fail" in a particular situation.

You didn't have anything ANYWAY.

If you want to succeed with attractive women, you're going to have to realize that things don't work the way they SHOULD work.

Attraction doesn't happen when you're a "nice, appropriate boy."

Here's an example of "being nice" vs. being a guy who lives in his own reality and does what he wants to do:

You're talking to a girl, and you decide that you like her.

You want to get her phone number and call her sometime.

Nice guy says, "Um, maybe you could give me your number, and I could call you sometime and take you out".

Guy who lives in his own reality says, "Give me your number" with a tone of voice and body language that is EXPECTING her to comply.

But, you might say, "Hey, wait a minute here... if you just try and tell her what to do and ASSUME that she's going to go along and give you her number, she might be offended."

Guess what?

You're right.

But, if she's offended, then she wasn't going to go out with you anyway.

On the other hand, if she WAS going to go out with you, the direct "Give me your number" will make her FAR MORE attracted to you.

Make sense?

In other words, the things that work BEST will get you MUCH BETTER and MUCH WORSE reactions from women.

Women who have boyfriends, are married, are lesbians, or whatever will RUN away... (that is, if they can overcome their emotional attraction to your communication style).

And women who are available and interested will only feel MORE attracted to you because you are just naturally assuming that you're going to get what you want.

If you really take the time to think about it, and think through the different scenarios, you'll realize that being direct and assumptive will work better in the long run.

Now, let's talk a bit about the specifics of what it "says" to a woman when you "walk away" from her in a situation like the one you've described...

You're talking to her for five minutes. She's laughing and you're being Cocky & Funny... you're teasing her, she's responding by hitting you and opening her mouth with the "Oh-no-you-didn't-just-say-that" look.

You see your friends.

You say, "Hey, good talking to you... I'm going to go talk to my friends" and you walk away.

What happens?

Does she think, "That jackass! I'm so offended that he didn't ask for my number!"?

Does she say to her friend, "That guy is stupid because he could have gotten my number and he didn't even ask for it"?

Does she immediately walk away and leave?

No, probably not.

In fact, what she will MOST LIKELY do, if you were being interesting and attractive, is think to herself "What just happened? Why did he leave? Should I go with him and keep talking to him? Should I just leave because he probably doesn't like me? Did I say something wrong?"

In other words, she's going to stand there thinking about YOU and what she can do to start the conversation again.

Really.

Is this creating some kind of "negative tension"?

Yes, it is.

But, it's not the kind of negative tension that makes situations with women go BAD.

It's the OTHER KIND. It's the kind that leads to SEXUAL TENSION and CHEMISTRY.

Now, the BEST thing you can do in a situation like this one is to say "Hey, I'm going to get back to my friends over there... good talking to you..." and then turn to walk away.

Right after you've "broken the connection" and she's starting to go into the "what just happened and why is he leaving" mode, you turn BACK around and say "Hey, do you have email?"... then go into the 3 minute email/number technique that I talk about in my ebook and Advanced Series.

Get it?

Another important thought...

When you have to "say" something about who you are as a man, how interesting you are, or how much she should feel attracted to you with WORDS, it automatically creates doubt... because if it was true, then you wouldn't need to SAY it.

It would be OBVIOUS.

In other words, the best way to communicate all of the most IMPORTANT things is through your BODY LANGUAGE.

What most guys try to do is CONVINCE a woman to feel ATTRACTION by telling her all kinds of things about themselves and trying to subtly drop little hints about making money, driving a cool car, etc.

BORING.

And worse, it usually BACKFIRES.

Women can smell the "I'm actually insecure, so I am trying to cover up for it by bragging" rap a mile away.

It makes them RUN (unless they're out to use you for free food and entertainment).

If you want to say all the right things in the shortest possible time, then you need to learn how to communicate with body language and voice tone ALONE.

WHAT you say isn't very important at all.

It really isn't.

HOW you say it is EVERYTHING.

Go back through your copy of my Advanced Series and notice all of the subtle body language points that I make, and think about what you've just read... it will pull everything together for you.

As you probably know, I also have a complete program that's dedicated to teaching you how to use Body Language to create ATTRACTION.

I highly recommend that you go and get yourself a copy of that program. It will help you out TREMENDOUSLY. You can check out some video clips of it here:

http://www.DatingTechniques.com/BodyLanguage


Oh, and if you're reading this right now and you would like to learn how to make women feel ATTRACTION for you, then you need to check out my Advanced Dating Techniques DVD/CD program.

I spend a lot of time going over the specifics of how to communicate beliefs, status, and self-image in a way that really triggers the "attraction mechanism" inside of women. I'll give you a great introduction on how to use Body Language as well.

This material isn't available anywhere else, in any program, at any price...

This is part of what makes my program unique... and when you see the body language of some of my special guests, you'll immediately "get it", and begin to understand how you need to modify your own body language to trigger ATTRACTION with women... rather than triggering FRIENDSHIP.

...and if you haven't downloaded your copy of my online eBook "Double Your Dating" yet, then you need to do that immediately. You can download it right now and be reading it within just a few minutes. It's here:

http://www.DatingTechniques.com/eBook

I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David D.

P.S. Make sure you take a few minutes and look at the entire list of programs I've put together to help you MASTER this area of your life called "women and dating." You can see them all here:

http://www.DatingTechniques.com/Catalog